My Rant part 1

Life. Fucking. Sucks.

We’ve all said it at different times. We’ve all experienced our own trials & tribulations…some expressed & some that we’ll take to our graves.

At the moment, I have a few good things going for me. Good friends, a job, my son who is the best thing…I also have love, unlike any I’ve ever known. I’m a middle-aged woman in the middle of a divorce who’s found true love for the first time in her life…and I should be happy right? No…because the love I want has been shoved so far out of my reach it makes each day of my meaningless existence even harder to bear. It’s like living in Hell. I know I’m not alone…I know he suffers too…and there’s nothing either of us can do about it. I get moody & depressed…pour out my feelings here. Sometimes I feel like I sound like a broken record…it’s all the same. No one wants to hear my pathetic whining over & over again. But I can’t help it.

It’s the only release I have.

I haven’t been online as much as I used to…some of you may have noticed, or maybe not. The drama lately has forced me into a hole…I don’t like it, don’t want it or need it…and it is mostly petty, trivial. Lost a good friend because of it…a lot of us did. And I was furious. Because of one person’s dissention. It’s just not as much fun as it used to be…and I’m tired. Old & tired. Not many people I talk to on a regular basis anymore…the ones I do know who they are and I appreciate it more than I can say. You’ve helped me through so much.  But I miss my happy family…and I’m not sure if it will ever be the same.

7 responses to “My Rant part 1

  1. I love you my sister, always. You are not whining, you are venting. And it is a necessity. We know, we understand, and we love you both so very much. *hugs you tight* Here for you, for always, forever.

  2. I love you Caro, you aren’t alone. This is venting not whining, you are entitled to have and express your feelings and we understand you completely. The two of you are loved very much. There will be a way somehow to get the two of you together. Somehow , Some way.
    Keep believing

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