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I feel like I’m lost in a dream
no, a nightmare
someone out there is watching
but I can’t see them
it’s just a shadowy figure
in a darkened corner
and I can’t find my way out of this maze
the voices are sobbing uncontrollably
I can hear them clearly
but the sounds are empty and hollow
there is no one here
I see a dark and viscous crimson liquid
pooling at my feet
slowly dripping from my hands
the deep wounds at my wrists
now I understand
realization hits me hard
like a sledgehammer against my skull
this is my personal Hell
and I can see Him now
the Reaper is waiting
patient and smiling

reaper shadow
He is calling to me from the shadows
Scythe humming sweetly by his side
but they won’t let me go yet
my demons are so much stronger
I cannot shut them out
it’s creating a thick fog
clouding my fevered mind
and I’ve become blind
I have no recourse
but to stumble through this labyrinth
hands now groping for my feet
clawing away the flesh
until it feels as if I’m walking on glass
bones shattering underneath me
I cannot even cry
He seems so much closer now
I see His skeletal hand reaching out
He wants me
if I could only get to Him
I would be free of their torment
but they will not allow it ever
this is my eternity of unending torture
but if I could somehow reach Him
if there is just the slightest possibility
at least I have a goal
something to work towards
surely He wouldn’t be there
if it wasn’t possible

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queen of hell 4

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unrequited reapings



agrona 4

He was gone, I was alone, and though I knew he would be back soon it seemed he’d been away forever.
There wasn’t even anywhere else for me to go. I had lost any interest long ago in traveling to the above world and anytime I even attempted it I became ill.
It just didn’t seem worth it anymore. There was no one there that I knew…everyone from my old life was now dead & had been for what seemed like centuries. Their memories faded more every day and even though I tried to hold on to some I new they would eventually disappear for good.
Kieran was with him. She was learning so fast, becoming a true master at her art and would soon go out on her own. It only meant that she would be away from me even more and I still had horrible bouts of loneliness.
He did not like it…me being by myself so much. His Kindred Sister often came to visit but she never stayed long as she had her own journey to make. I was tired even more lately…sleeping continuously for days mostly out of boredom even though I knew I didn’t need it all of the time. I was the Queen here but I ached for company.

I woke to the sound of whispers. As I lay there and quietly listened it seemed as if a thousand butterflies were flapping their wings inside my head. It was soft & soothing and I carried it with me for days floating weightlessly on the sounds. Somehow it managed to cure my melancholy but I wondered often how long it would last and possibly why it was there.
Often it would grow louder, softly buzzing for hours in my brain until I forced myself to sleep and then it would disappear. Occasionally it would go away for a day or two and then come back with a vengeance, like hundreds of bees alive in my head. On those days I could barely think and hid away even more.

This morning it was extremely loud but I found it was coming from somewhere else. It had left my body and was calling to me from deep inside the farthest caverns. The whispers had returned and spoke to me of wonderfully beautiful things. I left my bed and ventured out to find where the sounds were coming from.
I wandered for days following them, mellowed by their lyrical beauty until I came up on a small cave hidden beside the flaming river of blood. I needed to get on my hands and knees to crawl through the low entrance but inside it was high enough for me to stand & I saw it was lit by several stone lanterns. Then the whispers transformed…it became the sweetest music I had ever heard drumming directly beneath my bare feet. The soil was dark red and rock hard but I dug fiercely with my hands until they were bleeding from my efforts.

agrona 12
Her voice exploded when I breached the hollow where she had been entombed and I carefully removed her shroud. How long had she lain here waiting for me to find her? Gently grasping her thick wooden snath I slowly freed her from her crypt as she sang to me in a thousand different voices. Her lovely blade gleamed blood red in the glow of the fires when she suddenly went silent. My heart beat quickly as I listened and I heard a single word repeated over & over “Agrona, Agrona, Agrona…” I realized that it was her name she was revealing and tears fell as I sat on the floor of the cave clutching her to my chest and listening to her story.
A demon had hidden her there eons ago to get back at his master for a punishment he deemed unfit. I found it odd that he never mentioned it but it’s possible he had forgotten since so much time had passed. She had been sleeping patiently until she sensed my presence and was finally able to garner enough strength to contact me. But she was still very weak and needed badly to feed. I felt a new sense of strength inside myself just from having her near and knew that I could face the outside world again as I would have to to find her Prey.
I was happier than I had been in ages and as I left the cavern the air changed and suddenly He was there. My dark soul sang as I clung to him desperately…I had missed him so badly and felt as if I could finally breathe again.
He apologized for his extended absence as he kissed my tears away and was surprised to find me so far from our home until I told him what had occurred and revealed my treasured new friend. Her voice exploded again when he stroked her blade and she revealed her pain to him, naming her tormentor. He brought his own Scythe near, knowing they had been forged from the same steel, and vowed that she would have her revenge once she was properly fed & rested. She had suffered greatly but was once again part of our family. I knew she would always be by my side and I would be sure to bring her punisher to justice.

queen of hell 4

The Queen of Hell

unrequited reapings

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